Is there such a thing as a typical German? My husband John claims he can spot Germans in Ireland from a mile away. Dressed in hiking boots and rain gear, often in matching colours with their partners, stern looks on their faces and neat hair cuts.

When I met Anja for the first time in the Greystones Baby Group it was the familiar sound of my native language, rather than a typical German appearance, that drew my attention. Anja was there with her newborn baby girl and I with my 4-months old son.

The Beginning of a Friendship

With little to no family support, meeting another German in Ireland gave me a bit of familiarity and comfort to settle into my new life as stay-at-home mom in Greystones. Anja and I discovered that we were practically neighbours, but our paths had never crossed before we had children.

Anja grew up in West Germany, about 500km away from my hometown in East Germany. We both lived in Dublin in 2008 and worked in tourism, but occupied completely different social spheres. Whilst we do share an interest in languages and love Irish nature, Anja enjoys classical music and dreams of improving her piano playing skills one day. Now, with a similar routine as first-time moms, it didn’t take long for our friendship to sprout.

The Ladies who Lunch

Soon we had our regular Thursdays together, venturing through Greystones with our buggies. We met other moms, exchanged baby updates, and went for coffee or lunch. Keeping up with our little explorers got more challenging as time went on. But according to our husbands all we did was strolling along the promenade and relaxing on the beach, coffee in hand. Anja’s husband David called us “The Ladies who lunch” or the “Yummy yummy Friends”. In fairness, life wasn’t too hard on us and much more enjoyable than a 9-5 job behind a desk. All the more did we appreciate the time with our babies and each other when fellow moms returned to work after their maternity leave.

The Typical German in Ireland

Embracing all the offers and activities for moms with small kids in Greystones was a great door opener to the local community. But even beforehand Anja – who had moved to Greystones in 2014 – felt well integrated. “Greystones is full of blow-ins”, Anja tells me. “And Germans enjoy a good reputation in Ireland: as fantastic car manufactures, with reliable public transport and a refreshing bluntness.  Besides, the Irish are a nation of emigrants themselves, and hence are open towards strangers. So I always felt welcome.”

“Also, I don’t think Ireland is very different from Germany. However there were some moments of bemusement rather than a full-blown culture shock”, Anja tells me, when I ask her how she settled in as a German in Ireland. “Bus timetables in Ireland are pretty useless as they show the departure time from the terminus and not from the stop you are waiting at. Other than that, settling in Ireland was much easier than I expected. Whilst my first friends in Ireland were foreigners themselves, I made Irish friends over time by just following my own interests rather than actively looking for contacts.” That way Anja found friends and her musical home with the Bray Choral Society where she sings the Alto Voice since 2015.

Home Sweet Home – Bergisches Land

However there are certain things Ireland doesn’t do as well as Germany. “Christmas Markets, DIY and drugstores would be things I miss, if I had to name some”, Anja admits. In general, Anja speaks fondly of the region in Germany she grew up in. As she is describing the rolling green hills, farmland, forests and lakes between the industrial Ruhrgebiet and the higher parts of the Sauerland, I picture the Bergisches Land similar to the Wicklow Mountains.

Anja’s hometown Wermelskirchen is located between Wuppertal and Cologne, two vibrant young cities in a region bursting with scenery and visitor attractions. “There are actually quite a few record-holding sites”, Anja tells me. Such as the Eschbachtalsperre, the oldest water reservoir in Germany and a popular recreational area.

Wuppertal is famous for the world’s oldest electric elevated railway with hanging cars. Certainly the only one an elephant jumped out of into the river below after a botched circus stunt. The Müngstener Brücke is the highest railway bridge in Germany and some call it the “Bergisch Eiffeltower” due to its intricate iron structure and engineering finesse.

From Paris to Dublin

That didn’t keep Anja from going to Paris for three months to see the real Eiffeltower and gain her first experience of living abroad in 2000. Seven years later Anja set out to improve her English skills in Dublin and ended up staying much longer than intended. Ireland had set its hook.

When Anja returned to Germany in 2009 to work as a Literary Translator, she never lost connection with the Emerald Isle. Once she met David from Dublin through a mutual friend, visits to Dublin become more regular again until she moved back for good in …

In 2014 Anja and David got married in the beautiful Wupper Valley, combining the best of both her worlds. With traditional heart-shaped Bergisch Waffles, cream, and a literal cherry on top, they celebrated their bond for life. After Dublin had been their homebase for a couple of years, they re-located to the more rural Greystones. And the rest is history.

“Be Happy or Change“

“Be happy. If you are not happy, change something”, is the principle Anja lives by and her whole personality reflects it. Anja has a  subtle way of doing things, but determined at the same time. She certainly pursued her dreams and is radiating a sense of contentment. Hence there are no big changes planned at the moment: “I have no intentions to go back to Germany. I feel much more at home here in Ireland than in Germany”.

Is Anja the quintessential German, if there was such a thing? She definitely is one of the most reliable and honest friends I have here in Ireland. Anja speaks her mind, but never without tact or consideration. Both our understanding of timekeeping is in fact very “un-German”, meaning 10 minutes late isn’t late.

Being with Anja is always uplifting. Whether I am looking for a relaxing day out with the kids or a heart-to-heart, I can always count on her. Anja has become a true cornerstone in my life as a stay-at-home mom in Ireland. My German friend with her positive Irish nature.